Character counts: Caring

A caring person is a bright spot in a sometimes grim world where crime, anger, fear, hunger and loneliness have pushed even well-meaning people into isolation.

We've moved, as a society, from the front porch to the back yard. We've gone from social visits to video games and the VCR. It's as if we're so overwhelmed by the needs around us that we've built invisible walls, blocked our vision of other people's problems and focused on ourselves.

It's different with ethical people. They care. Caring is at the heart of an ethical person's character. It's a guideline for how an ethical person relates to the world and its people. A caring person is considerate, kind, compassionate and generous. A caring person always takes into account how decisions, words and actions are likely to affect other people.

Four-H members in the Southwind District learn this important life skill by caring for their projects -- and it does not matter if it is a livestock project or photograph. Our 4-H members take great care to produce the highest quality product they can.

Why do people show consideration, kindness, compassion and generosity to others? Some help others because it makes them feel good. Some show concern because everybody else seems to. Some show kindness to avoid embarrassment, to earn recognition, or to relieve guilt or because it hurts them to see other people hurting.

Genuine, selfless concern for others is a sign of ethical maturity. A big part of maturity is the ability to think and care about someone besides oneself. Selfish motives and selfish actions are childish motives and childish actions. Self-centered people tend to treat others simply as instruments of their own ends and rarely feel an obligation to be honest, loyal, fair or respectful. Caring people, on the other hand, have progressed from selfish to selfless, from inward-focused to outward- focused, from me-minded to we-minded and from a give-me approach to a give-you approach.

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" translates the general principle of caring and concern into an operational standard which encourages people to maximize the good and minimize the harm done to others.

Stakeholders are the people, groups or institutions likely to be affected by a decision, word or action. A person who wants to be ethical has a moral obligation to think seriously about every possible effect his or her decisions will have on all stakeholders.

The too-common, self-centered, "It's my life, and I'll do what I want with it!" fails to recognize that every person, group, or institution impacted by a decision has a moral claim on the decisionmaker.

Caring requires us to be as considerate, kind, compassionate and generous as our duties and responsibilities permit. But sometimes even love has to be tough. Sometimes really caring requires difficult decisions that are unpleasant for a stakeholder initially, but best for him or her in the long run. Sometimes responsibility seems to conflict with caring.

Show you care about others through kindness, caring, generosity and compassion. Live by the Golden Rule ... treating others the way you want them to treat you.