September 11 remembered

Hi neighbors. Today is Sept. 11 -- again. It comes around every year and I think every Sept. 11 since 2001 has been reinvented to suit the country's feelings at the time.

Make no mistake, Sept. 11 is a very emotional day of remembrance. It doesn't matter whether you had family in the Twin Towers, the Pentagon or on any of the planes that crashed -- every one in America -- and many people around the world -- had an emotional experience that day.

We have all been processing grief in our own way. There are many Web sites offering tips on coping with grief. Most stress letting your emotions run their natural course from a sense of loss, through anger, acceptance and getting back to your own life.

It seems to me most of America is still somewhere between anger and acceptance. But there is more than grief involved in what happened on Sept. 11, 2001.

Not only was our proud country's self-image slapped in the face -- but our own sense of virility was pushed. America's military could take on and defeat any army in the world. But as any great boxer will tell you, you can't prepare for every sucker punch that gets thrown your way.

Fighting a war (or fighting in the ring) is different than walking down the street and having some thug just step out of an alley and hit you with a two-by-four. Ambush, sucker punches -- both are considered cowardly acts and are held in disdain by most Americans. America has always prided itself for being the honorable combatant -- fighting fair, following the rules, not kicking anyone when they are down.

Obviously, some people were brainwashed past considering honor when they decided to kill thousands of people at random.

Do you remember what you were doing when you heard the news that day? I'm certain we all do; just as we recall the exact moment we heard about the shooting of President Kennedy.

I was sitting in the hospital here in Nevada next to my mother who was in the last stages of lung cancer and who died less than a month later. We hadn't turned on the television yet, but could hear some mumbled talk from the corridor. My brother called and asked if we had seen the news on TV. He said, "you'd better turn it on -- the World Trade Center has been attacked."

We immediately turned on the TV and watched the horror proceed hour-by-hour. My first thoughts were of my family. I wanted us together -- I wanted to know every one was safe. I called my son to come to the hospital and I called my daughter in Iowa. I just needed to connect, to hear their voice, see that they were not injured -- to KNOW that they were not harmed.

"Are you all OK? Do you have a place to go? Should we make arrangements to meet some where if there is a full-out invasion? Does your husband have a gun? Do you have medical supplies and food laid up? Where would be the safest place to head for? What will happen next? How did this happen?"

The shock of the attack was overwhelming to many Americans. People could not believe that such a thing could happen on our own soil. Who did this? That question didn't seem as prominent at the moment as the next one. Where was our government that was supposed to be protecting us? How could this happen and no one even anticipated an attack?

The worst thing was having no one to hit back. Have you ever been punched or slapped? Your first instinct is to hit back. But the people who actually did the deed were all dead already.

America was shocked, and then angry. We were grieving -- but we were also looking for someone to punch.

After many years of war we have found little satisfaction in chasing gremlins.

Perhaps it is time to regroup and rethink just what we need as a culture to find some satisfaction, some sense of justice that America is so famous for.

Let us never forget Sept. 11, 2001. I see nothing wrong with carrying a grudge against those who have so blatantly wronged us. But let's make sure we don't start a punching match with people in general just to work off a fit of anger.

Now is a time for cool heads, steady hands, coordinated efforts and well thought-out plans. It is a time for America to understand what is needed to feel safe again. Some may think America will simply forget and forgive with the passage of time. I won't -- will you?