Encouragers: Lighting up others keeps flame going

Someone once said, "A candle loses nothing if it helps to light another."

Encouragers know that. They look for ways to recognize others who are disheartened or just having a "blah day" and find ways to cheer them up.

The high school where I teach, the church that I attend, the retreats where I speak, the grocery store where I shop ... they all offer endless opportunities to encourage others by telling them how talented or creative or helpful or needed or valued they are. Endless opportunities. And I'm sure, dear reader, that even though your opportunities might be different than mine, they exist just the same. Why don't we allow our candles to do more?

What keeps us from offering words of encouragement? Is it jealousy? Insecurity? Laziness? Are we fearful that our "quota" will be used up and we won't have any left for the really important people we need to build up?

Saint Paul was an encourager. He was constantly writing letters to various churches, praising them for their faithfulness, for the use of their spiritual gifts, and for their sacrifice in "running the race" and not quitting. Even from his prison cell, he galvanized fellow Christians, inspiring them to continue the work he was prevented from doing. In his letter to the Thessalonians, he wastes no words: "...encourage one another and build one another up..."

I have been the recipient of encouragement that has changed my life's direction. When we lived in Houston and attended a Bible church, Dave and I became friends with the pastor, Jack, and his wife, Lael. It was she who pushed me to write down some of my crazy stories, realizing there were spiritual applications in all of them. Even though I felt totally inadequate when it came to writing or speaking, Lael saw potential and encouraged me.

That same friend also dragged me along to a conference for professional speakers. It was there I was critiqued by Carol Kent who later asked me to "come on board" and join her group of Christian speakers. Both Lael and Carol motivated me to write and rewrite and rewrite some more, to practice my speaking, and to never give up (and trust me, I wanted to).

Elaine, my Fort Scott friend, listened to my story about my struggles establishing a "platform" so that my name would be recognized and I could get my book published. It was she who suggested I contact the Tribune to submit articles for its religion section. It was she who sent me a wonderfully supportive e-mail after my first article was printed.

Ellen, a colleague at the high school, constantly prods me to continue working on high school plays. Every year after the final performance I tell myself that it will be the last one I ever direct, but no matter how discouraged I get, she always reminds me the student-actors are better off because of this experience. And so am I.

My lawyer friend Rick expressed concern that I might not be thick-skinned enough for this newspaper-writing task, yet he kindly offered to proof my articles before I wrote something that either got me sued or made me cry.

And there's my faithful husband, Dave, who always sees potential in whatever I undertake and praises my efforts, even when I fail.

Encouragers have used their candles to light mine, and hopefully I have been able to spread that light to others I meet.

On the "encouragement continuum of life," where do you fall? Are you the candle that spreads its energy, or are you the one that selfishly hoards your wick's potential? I "encourage" you to start today. Look for ways to compliment, to build up, and to inspire someone else. It just might be the best way to ensure your own light never gets extinguished.