Learning to cope through life; God will provide

Cope. Interesting word, isn't it? Merriam's Dictionary defines it as "to deal with and attempt to overcome problems and difficulties." I would like to share with you the story of one woman whose life is a testimony to how, with the help of God, we can cope with problems that might seem insurmountable.

My father was 36 when he died of multiple sclerosis, making my mom a widow at the age of 30. With no formal education, no car or driver's license, her first-born child dead, two children under the age of two and another on the way, my mother was left to cope.

Cope. Deal with it. Make the best of it. Handle it any way you can.

Just Cope. My mother's way was to rely on God.

Shortly after my father died, his father died. At his funeral my mother went into labor; a few hours later she delivered my brother David.

Cope. Increase prayer time.

Within a few months, my father's mother was killed when struck by another driver while in route to visit my mother and us grandkids.

Cope. Trust God knows what He's doing.

No job. No way to get around. No local support.

Just Cope. Recognize Who is in charge and know He loves you and will provide.

We then moved to Rich Hill, Mo., where my maternal grandparents helped my mother until we relocated to Fort Scott where she found employment at Mercy Hospital. I remember my family heading out in the morning, my two brothers and I walking to St. Mary's School while my mother continued on to her job. I couldn't understand how classmates whose parents didn't work had cars and televisions but we didn't. My mother explained the concept of "welfare" and said we didn't need it. According to her values, cars and televisions were luxuries, certainly not necessities, and we would only own them when we saved enough money to buy them. Besides, she was able-bodied and grateful she had a job. Even though from the outside it might have seemed that we were deprived, in her heart she knew that God had blessed us with much.

I'd rather have a car and television set, I would tell myself.

How excited my mother was when she found a rental home directly across from the Catholic school! Now walking to school was easy, and mom was a few blocks closer to her work. Another of God's provisions, she would tell us.

Mom wallpapered, carpeted, even added linoleum to the kitchen when she was able to save enough money ... "cash, always cash," she would say. The back porch was converted to my bedroom and now we had a three-bedroom home. My cousins in Denver sent us their hand-me-downs; friends from the Presbyterian Church bought us a membership to the YMCA; and we were thrilled. "Blessed," my mother called it.

Each of us has issues that require us to cope. "In this world you will have trouble," John 16:33 promises. The question, therefore, is not IF we will have to cope; the question is HOW we will cope.

We must all find our own way, but for me, I pray I can follow my mother's model and strive for that balance between self-reliance and divine assistance. In my opinion, that's what real copers do.