Wacky holidays

Hi neighbors. Have you seen calendars listing bizarre holidays for every day of the month? Most of these are little known and all of them have no credible origin. It's my opinion that some smart e-card marketing department created most of them.

Web sites that post these goofy so-called holidays are quick to point out that just bearing the title "National" or "International" doesn't mean they were created by Congress or celebrated in most countries.

Let's start with today, Jan. 10. Today is "Peculiar People Day." Now we all know (or are known as) a peculiar person. I suppose today we could take time to think of all the weirdoes we have known in our lives. Or to be kinder, think of some peculiar traits people we know have. Again, there is no source or recognized beginning date for the celebration of this "peculiar" holiday.

If you invite one of your peculiar friends over tomorrow, you can share another odd holiday. Jan. 11 is "Step in a Puddle and Splash Your Friends Day." What a great way to have fun with peculiar people! You may have to plan this day's activities ahead of time and fill some low spots in the yard with water from the garden hose.

It seemed strange to me that the next big event, ahem, was scheduled to fall on a Monday. Could it relate to football? Jan. 12 is dubbed the day of the "Feast of Fabulous Wild Men." If you are friends with some "wild men" who are fabulous and also peculiar, you can have three days of acting strangely and splashing each other in puddles.

You had all better straighten up before mid-day on the 12th however, as that "Feast" day is also called "National Pharmacist Day." No doubt a happy occasion for pharmacists, none of them seem to have any notion as to where the designated day in their honor originated.

I suppose if any of these pharmacists are also peculiar and/or fabulous, wild or men; they could continue the celebration all day.

As if there was any hope of getting a regular workweek out of such a string of odd holidays, the next one will nix that. We can blame Europe I suppose, Asia or Africa for that matter. No one seems to know where Skeptics Day came from. It has the haughty pre-amble of being "International" but no nation claims its origin.

With no real background check available, I'll remain a little -- well -- skeptical of the authenticity of this particular holiday. Of course feel free to send an e-card to any skeptics you know -- especially if they are pharmacists, wild men or peculiar.

If you can get all those wild and crazy folks calmed down, you can finish the last half of Jan. 13 trying to "Make Your Dream Come True" because -- you guessed it -- Jan. 13 is Make Your Dream Come True Day! Unfortunately, like the origins of this "holiday" there are no instructions on how to celebrate it or how reliable the outcome of the day might be.

Your dog, cat or hamster will enjoy the next day. Jan. 14 is "Dress Up Your Pet Day." And why not? If you couldn't make your dreams come true on the 13th, why not make your pets as miserable as you are and put stupid clothes on them.

If you spend all day trying to dress your pet to no avail, do not despair. On Jan. 15 you can just put a hat on them and call it done. Yes, the 15th is "National Hat Day."

Again, the word "national" is a bit grandiose as it is not a recognized or legitimate national holiday. Still, wearing a hat for any reason can't hurt anyone and you, or your pet, might like the new look.

If you are tired of trying to figure out something cool to do on these wacky holidays, or you just don't have a social life, you will enjoy Friday, Jan. 16! Another misnamed "national" holiday, this Friday is titled "National Nothing Day."

As wondrous and riddled with hidden philosophical ponderings as that day sounds like it could be -- remember Friday is a workday.

If you celebrate Friday's holiday and your boss doesn't, you might celebrate Saturday sitting home contemplating your navel. Saturday is called, "Ditch New Years Resolutions Day," and would be a good time to scratch off your list pesky resolutions such as never missing work, earning more money, and not sending so many e-cards.

I've saved the best for last -- and you thought it couldn't get any better didn't you? Next Sunday has two great reasons to celebrate -- "Thesaurus Day" and "Winnie the Pooh Day."